It’s a weekday, about 8 or 9 in the evening. You’ve had a long day at work, or a long day with the kids, or both.
You’ve managed to get through the dinner hour. Everyone’s fed, dishes are done, kids are bathed and off to bed, and you’re finally able to relax.
You have this small space of time in the evening that’s yours, and you are soooo looking forward to it!
Have you noticed that anxiety seems to be more acute late at night?
It is. This is particularly true if you’re dealing with a problem that you haven’t found a way to resolve.
The truth is, anxiety is almost always worse late at night or in the early morning. Whatever bothers you during the day takes on a whole new life after you climb into bed, and then some.
Okay, so tell me if you’ve been here before . . .
I started my Monday morning off silently complaining to myself about all the stuff I had to do in the week ahead. Not enough time, too many intrusions, how will I ever get my blog writing done, work on my book, see clients I have scheduled, take care of my dogs, do house stuff, and on and on and on . . .
As I’m chugging coffee and letting my imagination build a giant case for a bad week, I realized what I was doing.
Are you a victim?
Chances are you have been victimized at least once in your life if not many times. None of us can really escape that.
Some have had to endure extreme conditions or circumstances, and have been the victim of horrendous situations.
In my work I’ve talked to many people who’ve been severely abused or neglected, or who’ve been traumatized by great losses both personally and financially.
Here’s a question for you:
Can you go a whole day without looking at your cell phone? Better yet, can you go a whole hour?
Obviously, if you have a job where you have to put your cellphone to sleep for periods of time, then you probably do go hours without looking.
It’s a lament I hear often:
“Why do the same things keep happening? Why do I get in the same horrible relationships? Why do I pick the wrong jobs, wrong people, wrong everything? Why does everything always go wrong for me?!”
It’s easy to say something back like . . .
Sometimes everyone needs a reset. Life gets too crowded, energy pours out in every direction like a bad plumbing leak, problems abound, demands are high, and you are just worn out. This can leave you feeling depleted, overwhelmed, used up, fragmented, out of control, and discontent. These are signs that you have become disconnected from yourself. It’s time for a reset.
So the obvious question is ” What exactly is a reset?”
A friend asks you for advice about a problem she’s having, and every suggestion or idea you offer is met with “Yes, but that won’t work for me because . . .”
You’ve had the experience? I’m sure you have. I think we all have. Sometimes it happens in a one on one situation with a friend or colleague, and sometimes in a bigger arena like at a meeting at work where there is a brainstorming session to help solve a problem, and the suggestions are shut down as fast as they come up.
Have you ever been in a conversation where each new statement that’s uttered leaves you feeling like you’re sinking further and further into quicksand?
As you say something, the other person responds in a way that seems to totally miss the boat, and the more you say and the more they respond, the more chaotic the conversation becomes.
I don’t know about you, but I find it near impossible to stick with a regular exercise routine no matter how hard I try. I’m in awe of those people that hit the gym every day or every other day without a miss. Kudos to you! You have my undying admiration!
The closest I’ve come to that is going three times a week for about a month, and then something intrudes, and that’s it. Done.
So I decided to try again, but this time I did something different and it worked! So I’m passing it along in case you have the same problem, and need new strategy.